i fought and lost...

It was love..finally..i thought to myself...i was in love and i was loved back..but it didn't last long..i lost the love i found..i was obsessed with that love..i didnt have the courage to let go..i want to hold on..i want to stick by his side..i want to care for him and make sure he's okay..i want to be the girl that he shares everything with..he's sorrows..he's feelings...everything...i want to be by his side until the end, giving everything that i have..i tried and tried..i kept on falling..getting hurt and crushed by the only person that i thought would never do that to me..but he did..intentionally or maybe accidentally..he came back but then he left again, even before i could say anything..or maybe i said something wrong, something that is not supposed to be said for it is a jinx for this kind of relationship. i just can't take it anymore..once is enough..to feel you're losing someone so many times is unimaginable..the feelings are too hurting..im on the verge of breaking down, once again..love can be wonderful but at times it can be deadly too..i wonder when all of this can stop..when this pain can finally end..when i can finally ease myself into living..and love again..